June 20, 2010

To Ethan (The Men in My Life)

Dear Ethan,

Your father and I had a fight few days ago over the ever unsolved issue of him yelling at you ALL THE TIME.

There is no secret that your father has no patience for anything but golf. Ever since he's addicted to golfing, I hadn't seen him until you were born. Now, since your presence has drastically diminished his time spending on golfing, he has attached himself to Golf Channel, golf magazine, and golf session on Criagslist. Anytime you are left in the sole care of him, all I can think about is maybe you are now unplugging an electrical cord and putting it in your mouth because your father is on the couch rewinding the Golf Channel over and over again to study a specific swing position.

Not that your father is incompetent. He loves you very much. I believe he does more for his child than most of the fathers out there. Just he's a competent geek who loves golfing. 

I have my own system to keep the house in order in my own hands. After you came along, I had to involve your father simply because I couldn't do it all by myself. At first I had a hard time adjusting as he's always too slow to come to feed you, or he's not vacuuming the house clean enough. It's taken me a long time to accept that it's okay if he doesn't do things my ways even though my way is always the right way.

However, I can't really let go of his being impatience in terms of taking care of you. Whenever he forgets the fact that you are not a 30-year-old but a toddler who would not do anything he wants you to do, which happens all the time, he breaks down, loses temper and yells at you. Then you cry, and it breaks my heart. I was worried that it would not take too long for you to starting hating him.

Yet, the best part is you've never shown any sign of despising your father at all. You often call for him when you wake up in the morning. You enjoy being tickled by him. You run to the door once you hear the keys clinging sound as he comes home.

Your father and I have talked over this yelling issue, we fought over this. And I know that he's been trying very hard to keep reminding himself that yelling is not the only way to discipline you. And I can assure you, for what has happened between you and your father - the way you look at him now, the way you crawl up to him and kiss him on his lips, the way you touch his ear for comfort when you are tired - that alone is magnificent enough to push your father to become a more patient person than he thought possible.

On Father's Day, I want to let you know that this geeky, furious but loving guy is your father. He is your man. And you will be his.


Belinda @zomppa said...

Oh, you are so sweet. Ethan is one lucky young man and he will grow up to be a fine one. Hugs.

Anonymous said...

be patient with him who is learning to be patient.

CheapAppetite said...

aww... they are so cute together.

Fresh Local and Best said...

This is a very sweet post. It makes me wonder what type of parent I will be when I have a little one. I hope I am a patient mother, but you never know how you'll react until you're in that position.